#like obviously if this actually happened it probably wouldn't fix anything at all

[maculategiraffe]

for the longest time I didn't know what was up with anybody in my family, and then I figured out my sister and I and my dad all have adhd but I still didn't know what was up with my mom, and then my sister said she thought our mom and I were both autistic and I spent awhile considering that, and now I must say I think all four of us are autistic AND have adhd, and furthermore I also think all my aunts and uncles and cousins are autistic and have adhd, and the three of my late grandparents I ever met were all definitely autistic also. probably my dad's mom was too but I never met her because she self medicated so heavily her whole life with booze and cigarettes and benzodiazepenes and probably like seconal and nembutal that she died pretty young. also steve is definitely autistic and I strongly suspect both his parents are

unfortunately my mom starts shrieking and throwing chairs (metaphorically. mostly. although she did once drop kick a toaster) if anyone ever floats the idea that anyone she has ever met might be autistic, so her internalized self loathing is still firmly in place and the idea that the baby might have similar neurological tendencies to literally every single one of his known genetic forebears is freaking her the fuck out because it's "mean" to "accuse" someone of being autistic. because apparently it's NOT mean to make a person feel like they're failing the Last Judgement anytime they say or do anything, and refuse to consider that there might be any reasons for a person acting in any way she deems eccentric besides the person just being too lazy or wilfully perverse to put in the effort to Be Normal.

but my mom is also aware on some level that she is not normal, and also thinks that it's because she is lazy and perverse and not making enough of an effort, which means she resents herself as much as she resents the rest of us, and refuses to contemplate figuring out what would actually make her happy because the fact that she's not happy the way she's living means there's something wrong with her. because she is living the right and normal way to live. so stop saying anything is wrong because only an abnormal person would say that and (gripping a wineglass so hard it shatters) nobody in this family is abnormal.

I obviously can't fix her but it makes me feel so much better just to understand where all her constant nonsense is coming from. she'll start bitching about somebody on TV doing something stupid that's going to get him in trouble and she goes-- at this absolute edge of nervous breakdown pitch, I cannot describe the hysterical rage that is barely contained in her chest when she says something like this, nobody would act like this. nobody would do this. and I'm like sure they would and she's like NO THEY WOULDN'T and I'm like ...oh, oh yeah, the hyperempathy thing. she identifies so strongly with every person before her, even the fictional ones, that it's like physically painful to see them make decisions she wouldn't make. just like it is to see me and my sister making decisions she wouldn't make and leading lives she wouldn't lead. so instead of going "oh! I would never!" she's got to go NOBODY IN THIS WORLD WOULD EVER. THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN. EVERYONE IS NORMAL OR ELSE THEY ARE NOT REAL.

it's just a really good perspective to have. like... I get it now. that's really all that's changed but it feels like a lot. that I get it now.

[lovelycrimsonredsnow]

can i request headcanons for a yandere aventurine?? please ignore this if your reqs are closed or if youre uncomfortable!

Not at all anon! Sorry if this is short I have no wifi atm 😔

~Yandere Aventurine headcanons~

(tw! Co-dependancy, obsessive and unhealthy behavior, mentions of murder, mentions of suicidal thoughts. Viewer discretion is advised)

🪙 to everyone saying "oh he'd be a manipulative yandere who's ultra possessive!" Well yes, but no.

🪙 manipulative yes, but more in the sense he's pretty much lost everything and everyone he cared about. Can you honestly look at that man and tell me his entire mental state wouldn't be dependent on you?

🪙 'oh you wanna cook? But what if your hand slips and you cut yourself?!' or 'what if you cut off your finger and I'm not here to help you and you bleed out!?' kinda thing, he will subtly manipulate you into not being able to do much of anything without him. Both out of fear something will actually happen whilst he's not looking and his need to have you near himself at all times.

🪙 he's not "possessive" per say...or that's just what he wants you to think.

🪙 but every time he brings you out to the casino with him, his arm is always wrapped tightly around your waist...perhaps even to tight to breathe sometimes.

🪙 and the aeons forbid if some guy looks at you for to long...(Which even 1/4 of a millisecond is to long in his book) He's shooting that guy immediately.

🪙 what do you mean he was just glancing in your direction? Don't you see he was obviously trying to size you up? So he could take you away where he could possibly hurt you!?

🪙 yah...ngl he's a piece of work. A hot one tho

🪙 and just like that his paranoia got the best of him. Congratulations! You're now stuck in his apartment without any chance of getting out! Ever.

🪙 you can cry and scream...(Which in all honesty will make him feel bad, but not because he kidnapped you.) But nothing can persuade him to let you out without him with you.

🪙 why cant you see? He's protecting you! Like how a loyal dog protects its owner. You'll realize sooner or later and thank him...

🪙 he's going all in for you. Won't you be a good spouse and cheer him on?

~×extras!×~

🪙 despite the two of you not actually being married (dw, he'll fix that soon) he calls you his spouse a lot, especially to his coworkers (rip topaz's ears).

🪙 he has a really hectic schedule, so most of the time he doesn't even get home untill midnight when your asleep. Does that stop him though? Absolutely not. He'll shower, change, eat....then immediately get into bed with you and burry his face in the crook of your neck. It's probably the highlight of his day tbh (other than seeing your face through the security cameras he installed in his home)

🪙 like I mentioned be his entire mental state is very dependent on you. If your angry about being locked you (rightfully so) and yell at him, despite his calm demeanor he's gonna be upset for the rest of the month. If you sob and beg to be let go he's probably just gonna cry with you...

🪙 also, something I forgot to mention before, he spoils the ever loving shit out of you. You so much as glance at something expansive through a window and he's going inside immediately to get it for you. Nothing is 'to good' for this love <3 (that and he thinks if he spoils you more you won't try to leave him)

🪙 will pretty much do whatever you want (except let you go), want him to pamper you? He's got a spa date ready. Just want a day to yourself? Well...he won't be happy but he'll do it! (He's gonna be cooing at how cute your face is through the cameras)

🪙 if you tried to leave him however...well he's deffinally gonna internalize it. Was his cockiness to much? Did he not spoil you enough? Why why why do you want to leave him?

🪙 he'll grovel and beg at your feet to stay with him, whatevers wrong he can fix it! He'll cry and cling to your legs (give this man a trophy for his award winning act), sobbing as he tells you he doesn't want to live anymore if he can't have you.

🪙 and if you don't immediately change your mind....well, that may be the first time in his entire life he gets angry at you...

[hazbin-a-helluvamagines]

Hiya, as you have requests open could you do some headcannons (sfw and NSFW perhaps?) for Charlie, Velvette & Verosika dating a male! reader who's on the insecure/shy side?

"Good Boy" ; Charlie Morningstar, Velvette, Verosika Mayday

SFW:

She's the absolute sweetest, my god. Every day, praising everything she sees about you, letting you know how much she loves you, giving you soft hugs and shoulder rubs...

Since you're on the shyer side, she'd always make sure to ask if you're comfortable coming to social events with her.

If so, she'll bring you along and not force you to interact, but introduce you as her boyfriend if you're comfortable with it. But if not? No problem! She can either go by herself or you two can have a night in.

She's also constantly encouraging you to put yourself out there, because if people don't love you for who you are the way she does, good! They didn't deserve you, anyways.

"It'll be okay, S/O! You're so amazing, they're bound to love you! And hey, what's the worst that could happen?"

She totally understands if you're not comfortable doing all that, though. She'll give you her jacket and calmly comfort you.

Plus, her cuddles are really amazing. She'll hold you on her chest and kiss your forehead and all over your face, reminding you just how much she loves you.

And she loves those smaller intimate gestures. Comparing hand sizes, neck kisses and nuzzles, and the like.

NSFW:

Soft dom. Straight up.

Lots of praise, kisses, promises and declarations of love as she guides you in and out of her cunt, usually riding you so you don't have to put too much effort into it to be pleased.

Charlie is most definitely a service top, she gets off on your pleasure.

Seriously, blowjobs, handjobs, just about anything, she gets pleasure out of it when she makes you feel good.

Definitely a praiser in bed.

"You're doing so well, S/O, good boy! I'm so proud of you..."

Honestly, the easiest way to turn her on as her partner is to call her "Charlotte". She doesn't like it when people who aren't close to her do it, but when you do it? It's like flipping a switch in her head.

Her tongue is extendable and prehensile. She can make it just about as long as she wants and curl around just about anything, including your dick. And she won't have any second thoughts, either.

Sometimes, if you piss her off beforehand, she'll be a tad more rough, and the demon form may come to play. The horns, the tail, the sharper fangs, the inverted eye colors with slit pupils, the whole shebang.

But afterwards, it's right back to soft and loving, gentle Charlie.

She's a pro at aftercare, luckily, and she makes sure your every need and want is met. :)

SFW:

She's not the nicest to just about anyone, and you're no exception. Sure, she's nicer by comparison, but she can hardly be considered polite.

Still, though, she has those rare moments where she'll actually show you that she loves and appreciates you, as selfish and rude as she is.

For example, a quick peck on the cheek after she's done something particularly obnoxious, or ranting to you before a big show she's nervous about.

"That fuckin' bitch can't even be bothered to fix that rat's nest on her head for the big event, and now I have to pull the rest of the girls together!"

Of course, she wouldn't tell you if she didn't trust you and love you. She wouldn't think it's worth it to bare the way she feels so openly.

She'd probably try to convince you to model for her to boost your confidence. If you did, she'd be considerably nicer to you than all her other models, for obvious reasons.

After all, she isn't dating any of her other models. They aren't any of her concern.

If you refuse, she'll be pouty for a bit, but eventually begrudgingly accept it, although she'll let you know that she's still not happy about it.

NSFW:

Mean dom, oh my god. Like, full on bordering on dominatrix, punishment and all.

Obviously, of course there's a safeword and consent is always implied. She's a lot of things, but she's all for consent.

That doesn't mean you don't have to be a bit of a masochist to fuck her, though. She'll make you please her first, fingering her, eating her out, or something along those lines, chasing her own pleasure before she thinks of pleasing you in return. And even then, it all depends on how she thinks you did.

"Mm~... Fuck, you love this, don't you~? Dirty little slut~."

Yeah, she has a thing for dirty talk, degradation (giving), and she probably has a mild Mommy, Mistress, or pet play kink, honestly. But the odds are she will never bottom. For you or for anyone else.

I could also weirdly see her being into choking or some other kink that gives her complete power over you.

But of course, at the end of the day, she still loves you very much, and she'll never not let you cum.

Even though she teases and edges for up to hours before she actually gives in and gives you what you so desperately need...

SFW:

Honestly, Verosika is a really sweet girlfriend, although it does take her a little while to actually start showing you that side of herself.

She's had bad relationships in the past, namely with Blitzø, so she's still recovering from that and learning not to put all her eggs in one basket. Or more accurately, not to put all her faith in a brand new relationship.

But honestly, once she's over that? You're basically fully integrated into her life. Her posse loves you, you're basically one of them.

And thanks to dating Verosika, Vortex is also usually helping to protect you. What kind of bodyguard would he be if he couldn't protect his boss' boyfriend, too? Especially when he's never seen her so happy before.

"Heya, gang. This is S/O, my boyfriend~. Isn't he hot~?"

Of course, the group immediately accepts you, absolutely adoring the fact that you make Verosika so happy and feel so loved and cherished.

NSFW:

More of a switch, to be honest? Like, even as she maintains her usual persona, she's encouraging you to thrust into her, to fuck her hard, etc.

Like, she isn't outright domming you, but she also isn't subbing, she's kind of somewhere right in the middle of that, trying to encourage you.

She's a succubus, so her method of trying to give you confidence is to make you feel sexually desired, which is why she never holds back any noises you make her make at all. She wants you to know you're the one doing that to her.

"A-Ahn~... Oh, S/O... Right there, baby boy~... Yes, fuck, ngh... So good~..."

After all, if you can successfully please not just any succubus, but the Verosika Mayday, herself? That's got to do something for your self-esteem, right?

Besides, she's a succubus. She's really good at pleasuring people, and like Charlie, her tongue is extendable and prehensile, thanks to the whole 'succubus' thing.

She's someone who doesn't mind being heard even from outside the bedroom. After all, why should she be ashamed that her boyfriend makes her feel so wonderful, and that she does the same for him in return? Nothing shameful about it.

[rekino2114]

I just thought up a prompt for Kanade otonokoji being proposed to. How about She's hanging out with her boyfriend when suddenly he's says he doesn't wanna be her boyfriend any longer which leads Kanade into having yandere thoughts, when suddenly he says that he wants to be her husband instead. I was hoping you could also do this for Arei and Teruko is possible.

You propose to kanade, teruko, and arei by saying you don't want to be their bf anymore

Kanade otonokoji

"I don't wanna be your boyfriend anymore?"

"Huh?"

Kanade actually felt surprised when you said that, which is uncommon for her to say the least

This wasn't supposed to happen, kanade loved you with her entire being. You had no idea what she would do for you if you just asked her. You were her darling, the most important person on the entire planet. No one else in this world even came close to your perfection. She genuinely couldn't live without you.

What did she do wrong? She treated you like a God on this earth. She would have given you literally anything you could have wanted, just in exchange of you loving her and staying with her forever. If you just told her what she did wrong, she could fix it

Or maybe she could try to fix you, just to change your pretty little head a bit, not as much as hibiki of course, she still wanted you to love her of your own volition but maybe she could just make it so you loved her just as much as she loved you, she would have just put some beautiful thoughts in your brain about her and you wouldn't have even known the difference. Just to ensure that you would never leave her

"I want to be your husband"

Oh.............nevermind

All of her previous thoughts disappeared, and her head was now filled with images of your wedding and life together. She hugged you and ranted about how much she loved you and was glad you weren't leaving her.

She should have never doubted you. Of course, you loved her, and of course you were going to be together forever, and she didn't need to do absolutely anything to you to make sure of that........but that idea did sound pretty fun, maybe she should try it on hibiki next time

Teruko tawaki

"I don't wanna be your boyfriend anymore"

As much as she doesn't want to admit it, teruko knew this day would come.

It was just inevitable. Her luck had taken everything away from her, her family, her health and it would have eventually taken her life. She was used to it at this point.

But there was someone her luck couldn't have taken away from her, her happiness, which was you, the fact that you entered her life alone was the luckiest thing to have ever happened to her, and the fact that you loved her and stayed with her trough everything, that was the best thing in her life period. You were the best thing in her life.....so obviously it had to end.

The worst part about this is that she really couldn't blame you. Who would wanna date someone who, just by being near you, puts your life at risk? She was fine with her luck affecting her even if she hated seeing you sad whenever she got hurt, but the fact that you could be hurt just because you loved her was just so unfair and it broke her heart.....so it was probably for the best to end this

She knew this would happen so she promised herself not to cry......even if it hurt so mu-

"I want to be your husband"

"W-what?"

She was more surprised by your proposal than your sentence from before, but when she fully realized what was happening she obviously said yes and hugged you

"You made me so worried"

"Why?"

"Did you think "I don't want to be your boyfriend anymore" would be a good opening for a proposal?"

"I didn't think you'd instantly assume I'd wanna break up with you, I love you so much teru, I thought you knew, I would never ever leave you"

"..........thank you"

"It's nothing, I'm sorry"

"No it's fine.........I'm just really happy now...... can we stay like this for a while?"

"Of course, anything for you teru"

You stayed wrapped in each other's arms for longer, and teruko could feel herself smiling so wide......she had never been this happy to be wrong

Arei nageishi

"I don't wanna be your boyfriend anymore"

"..........wait what?"

Arei though this was a prank for a few seconds, it had to be, you couldn't have been serious, there was no way you, one of the incredibly few people she actually gave a shit about in the world and that she even loved more than anything would abandon her like this.

There was no way you were just willing to throw away everything you worked towards, all of the talks and help you gave her in trying to become at least a little bit less shitty, she had never wanted to become a so called good person but she wanted to at least be someone who people wouldn't raise their eyebrows at when they saw you together, so that people wouldn't ask you if she was forcing you to date her whenever you announced that she was your girlfriend........even if she would never admit it.......she wanted to become someone worthy of you with your help.

So there was no way you would just give her the hope that she could become less shitty and then just leave her alone like that, did you even love her at all?

Even if she promised herself to beat the shit out of you later for this she knew it would have never happened, she loved you too much to let that happen..........why the hell was she still this soft with you?

"I want to be your husband"

"..........seriously?"

Arei wants to be mad at you for starting your proposal like that, but the genuine happiness in her heart that your words caused didn't leave any anger in her body, so she just hugged you and grabbed the ring, saying "obviously" in the meantime

"That was the worst proposal ever by the way"

"What do you mean?"

"How am I not supposed to think you want to break up with me after you say something like that?"

".......now that you put it like that, I guess you're right"

"You're a dumbass"

"But you still said yes"

"......yeah.....cause I love you"

"I love you too arei.....I can't wait to marry you"

Arei looked at her new ring and then back at you, she flashed you a smile, a pure and genuine smile

"Me too"

[npdzane]

I think the fandom of Ninjago should talk about Zane's fear of losing his humanity and his fear of any negative emotion in general. And how they contradict each other.

(warning, yap sesh ahead) TLDR: can nindroids get therapy? If so we need 5 therapists for Zane immediately

It's already established that Zane has a fear of being seen as just a machine, nothing but a freezer with fake coded emotions. But I haven't seen anyone talk in depth how he seems to turn off his emotions whenever he's faced with grief or stress, and how he only learnt to not do that far into his life.

He probably picked up that habit from when Dr. Julien turned off his memory switch before "dying" back in season 1. And he realized that if he went so long not feeling bad about the "death" of his creator by simply not remembering it or not having the actual emotion of grief, he wouldn't feel bad either when anything similar happened if he just turned off his emotions like Dr. Julien did to him.

The fact this lasted as long as it did meant nobody picked up on it* and tried to tell him he was wrong. Which only validated that idea because if there was a problem with it, someone would've told him..right?

But how can you say you don't want to lose your sense of humanity as a robot while simultaneously doing something humans can't whenever you're faced with stress? I'd say he'd overthink it, and feel guilty about not being honest with himself. He knows hes being irrational, but hes still terrified of the thought of no one seeing him as a person.

But at the same time, he's never been taught how to face stress by himself. Only for other people. It's not like he just doesn't know that ignoring your feelings is a way to avoid the problem and a bad coping mechanism, he obviously knows that. He probably just doesn't know any other solutions because his situation is so niche.

Because how could anyone not want what he has? In his position, he probably feels as if everyone would kill to be a nindroid. Since nobody tells him otherwise. We even see clips where the others use Zane's robot body as a joke or in one case, use him as a fucking cleaning robot. Can you imagine how dehumanizing it must feel for someone to be forced against their will like a puppet into doing a weeks worth of chores?

Zane probably feels as if his fears are irrational. Like he shouldn't have them because being a nindroid seems to be the only thing that others care about when they see him. He's a logical person for sure, but everyone has irrational thoughts and unless you face the reason you have those thoughts they aren't going to go away and they'll cloud your judgement. Zane, for sure, is not doing that. Because we can see he just simply forces himself to stop having emotions when they happen instead of facing them, which only fixes it temporarily.

So hes afraid of being seen as just a freezer with fake emotions (i have more to say about the "fake emotions" part), and because he doesn't face his feelings about why hes afraid of that he lets himself believe that is how people see him. Which causes him to think that fear is stupid and that he shouldn't have it, which makes him turn off his emotions for a while, and the cycle continues.

He also might believe his emotions arent needed. Like maybe at some point he convinces himself that if everyone else only sees him as a calculator with ice powers, maybe that's what he actually is. So on top of everything, he feels like since hes only a computer, all his emotions are fake. Therefore unnecessary.

Not to mention he most likely feels as if he's weak for letting Vex manipulate him. And emotions = weak, weak = manipulated again, manipulated again = letting everyone down. But thats just a little thought i had to let out.

If i could write I'd probably make a fic about him being confronted by this fear, but until then it'll stay in my brain.

Poor boy. Just look at him. He doesn't deserve this bro AUUGIGUGJGJGGHHGHHHH IM AUTISTIC 🥹

Edit: *i rewatched crystalized today and realized the other ninja ARE aware of Zanes habit. They just dont gaf 😭WHICH MAKES IT WORSE!!!

[l-in-the-light]

The most embarrassing series of posts about Lawlu you will ever read: edition Dressrosa (part 5)

Are we ready for the feels? Because my "Love is a Hurricane tale" of Lawlu analysis continues on into Dressrosa, the land of love and passion! In this episode we will focus on Luffy and Law seperately. This post will be much more serious as well. Lots and lots of scrutinizing analysis ahead!

Let's point out two things here: apparently it was Sanji who was the rebel and left as the first one, attracted to amazing smells. Luffy on the other hand, actually tried to get closer to Law and listen properly.

And, one group of people is now enteirely missing. For once, it wasn't Luffy's fault, he wasn't even the first one to venture out and that tells us a lot already. Law, despite rather displeased with that outcome, decides not to do anything about it. Perhaps one of the remaining Strawhats told him not to worry about it... but would they say it? We're left with Nami, Usopp, Brook, Chopper, Robin and Momo. They're kinda a bunch of people easily scared and paranoid. Robin is the only exception, but she would rather just chuckle at all the chaos that's happening rather than reassure anyone.

I think the more likely option is Law trying to play it cool so that the rest won't worry too much. Whether he's personally worried or not wouldn't have mattered, he already feels like taking care of these people is his responsibility and he needs to be strong for them. He probably did worry himself a bit here. Let's switch to Luffy from now on:

As fast as Luffy realized (thanks to Sanji) that things aren't going as predicted, he tries to find a fast fix for it himself. I mean, he had a pretty good idea about it, sadly he was stopped with his attempt. This will start a streak of Luffy's attempts to actually stick to the plan, as disbelieving as that sounds right now. After all, he didn't listen to the end about the plan, obviously Luffy doesn't care??

If he doesn't care, why is his initial reaction towards Zoro slightly angry here? Oh, maybe because Law assigned them into one group and Luffy realizes *they have to stick together*. That's exactly why he left after Sanji (who shouldn't actually be in their group, but nevermind), it wasn't just for adventure (ofc that was important as well), it was to stay with their group. Ofc right after Luffy quickly snaps into his usual happy go lucky attitude, thinking it would be fun to chase Zoro, but let's keep in mind that's his second reaction, not the first one, and that's already giving us a hint what will be Luffy's priority from now on.

Luffy is unusually interested in finding the smiles factory. Concerned even. Perhaps he was keeping in mind Law's warning that finding the factory won't be easy and is reminded now of that.

Putting aside Luffy's clear PTSD reaction here (proving us he's still not over Ace's death, because why would he be), despite the fact he declares he wants flame-flame fruit, he doesn't immediately jump to the decision of doing everything he can to get it. It's actually only after Franky's encouragement that he makes his final decision! Very unusual for Luffy to hold back on something that important for him and needing encouragement. It's Luffy who encourages people usually, he just goes and reaches his hands to grab what he wants without fretting over it. I wonder why is he hesitating so much?

Ofc Luffy's enthusiasm to stay undercover is lovely, but he still almost fails with it right afterwards, because, well, he's Luffy. And why does he need to stay undercover? Oh right, so someone's plan in Dressrosa wouldn't be affected!

Meanwhile we have Law who tries to play it calm and cool for the group, but he's actually growing anxious. There are already two signs that the plan is going to have more problems than expected, since people in Dressrosa act normal despite their king abdicating, and then CP0 arrives. He won't voice his doubts explicitly though, he knows he needs to keep morale of the group up. But when they make it to the bridge, he already decided not to use his devil fruit to save up strength, he knows there will be problems up ahead thanks to all those signs.

It's kinda heartwarming but also a bit sad to see Luffy holding back so much. At all times he tries his best not to blow his cover. But Luffy is really terrible at lying, so he's fretting around a lot, clearly stressed from all the unfavourable developments. He even tries to stop himself from cheering on for Bellamy, something he would usually do without a second thought. Officially he claims he's doing it for Franky, but we all know why Franky told Luffy to be undercover: it was all for Law's plan to succeed, and attracting attention would be bad for it. It's not very direct, but all of Luffy's efforts are actually for Law and his plan.

Law remembered his own nature: giving out orders expecting others to live up to them. He's indeed just like Luffy here haha. Though we can excuse him a little, the situation was bad after all. Luffy meanwhile does it all the time.

Top images: Again, poor distressed Luffy is afraid his identity will be revealed and he will be the one responsible for blowing up Law's plan. He really doesn't want to disappoint him. Compare this to when he inflitrates the castle with Viola later on (bottom images), he doesn't even hesitate to take off his disguise even though his cover wasn't even blown yet. Only after Luffy removes his koi fish costume, the guy realized it was Strawhat Luffy. But Luffy doesn't care anymore for being undercover.

The contrast is shocking with the previous image. It just proves how much he was struggling and bracing himself to stay in that disguise in the collosseum, it must have been hard for him. But Luffy would try his best and beyond for Law. He just would do the same for Ace, that's why he couldn't ignore flame-flame fruit bait.

Luffy got fed by Rebecca, so he feels like he owes her. He listens to her story, about the country, about the toy soldier, he clearly wants to help her, but he stays silent. Again, unusual reaction for Luffy, normally he would be already enthusiasthically shouting that he will get rid of Doflamingo for Rebecca. But, beating up Doffy wasn't part of Law's plan, so Luffy just sits quietly, torn internally.

Let's compare it to, let's say, Drum Island Arc. Luffy doesn't hesitate at all. That's the Luffy we know.

Luffy is still listening to Rebecca. Gets reminded of Goa Kingdom. He still doesn't declare he will kick Doffy's ass. His resolve to not disappoint Law is really strong, if he's able to stop himself like that.

Law puts up a tough front, but I think he's kinda bluffing here, just throwing Doflamingo's words back at him. Internally, he must be worrying and hoping he won't mess things up himself, that he's able to withhold Doflamingo long enough.

It's not even a matter of whether he believes in what he says himself, but the dedication: he will do anything in his might. Is it for the plan, that backfired on him already? Or did his reason shift, yet again, to what it was in Punk Hazard and that means keeping Luffy relatively safe? He didn't put Luffy in his own group, the one that was at most risk, he didn't leave him up on Sunny (he probably would have wanted to, but not even Law can control Luffy's deep craving for adventure). Law is now just buying time so Luffy's group can destroy the factory; that's his chosen way of keeping them out of trouble and instead taking it all up on himself.

Another bluff from Law. We know he doesn't know what that D. even stands for, so there's no way he could have that much faith in it. After all Law is having trouble believing in things after Flevance. He says this line just because he knows it will rile up Doflamingo, and also because of his trust in Corazon. Cora-san lied a lot though so there's no way Law would take that line at face value and not doubt it at all.

Riling up Doflamingo is a sign that Law allowed him to play on his emotions. Provoking him here will end up in a disastrous result for Law. But let's rewind a moment earlier, Doffy is on a call with his subordinate, telling them to make the factory's security stronger. Ofc Law would lose his calm over that. Because who's in the group destroying the factory? Luffy. Law took it as his personal duty to keep him safe.

Back to Luffy's side now. Wait a moment. Luffy tells his crew to stop the rebellion in the oppressed country?? Despite having been fed by Rebecca and owing her a favour? Did someone just exchange Luffy with an alien here?? That's not the Luffy we know!

Though to be fair, even if it's a bit of a backwards logic, he does think it will help Rebecca as well, because she doesn't want the toy soldier to be in danger. But look at Zoro's reaction here. He's clearly taken aback. Our Zoro, the very first crewmate of Luffy, who was with him practically from the very start. And that Zoro is surprised by Luffy's reaction. He expected him to fully support the rebellion. If that's not the final argument to how strange Luffy is behaving, then I doubt anything can convince you.

His crewmates are getting involved with the rebellion, but Luffy is still quiet and refusing to go against Law's plan. Franky finally loses it and says he will do it, even if it means he will have to do it alone.

And that's finally the moment Luffy breaks his resolve. He's not gonna leave a crewmate alone. He's gonna help with that plan as well, just to fullfill Rebecca's wish, already planning to leave the collosseum before the final fights. It took Luffy only like 30 chapters to finally decide to do what he truly wants to do. For Luffy liberating countries and making people free is very important. He knows already that the peace is Dressrosa is only a facade and he hates when peace is just a facade, it's not a true peace to him. He would go fly some punches the moment he realizes that. The only reason he didn't was Law.

But let's keep in mind, it doesn't paint Law as a bad guy here. His original plan did involve dethroning Doflamingo, just indirectly, not through punching him in the face. Luffy believes Law to be the good guy who also wants to help this country, so he believes in Law's plan. But Luffy will never leave his crewmate in need and that's the only reason Luffy decided to go against Law's plan in the end. We don't know how it would end, would Luffy still try to stop the rebellion after he joined with them? We will sadly never know.

Before they even know what's going on, Luffy's face is already very worried. He clearly has a bad feeling. Perhaps it's an early sign of his future sight talent that will evolve only much, much later. In this case it activated not because Luffy himself was in danger, but because he had a bad feeling someone dear to him is.

What an interesting reaction from Luffy after he realized Doflamingo got Torao. "Torao, why are you fighting with Mingo?!" why would Luffy care about it in a moment like this? Oh, perhaps because he was still believing in Law's plan and facing Doffy was never part of it. That's your final proof that Luffy took this whole operation seriously, he constantly was thinking about Law and his plan, and trying not to disappoint him, so of course he's shocked beyond all logic that Traffy himself went against it. He didn't have much choice, at least that's what Law believes. He would never take an alternative: backing out, because then full attention of Doflamingo would focus on Luffy's group.

And here we go, Luffy's reaction to Law passing out from the lead bullets. Flashback to Ace and Marineford definitely played itself inside Luffy's head at this moment.

How dare you, Mingo, indeed.

Screaming after him, trying to leave and forgetting seastone bars make it impossible for him, very distressed but calmed himself down because he can feel Law's soul didn't yet leave his body. That's probably the first reference to Luffy's skill of being able to tell when someone is just passed out and when they're dead or close to dying (it's the last option in this case btw).

Despite all the chaos and worry, Luffy is still focused enough to realize that the plan did go astray and is so very taken aback. He might even wonder if it's somehow his own fault here, after all he did go to the collosseum, if he didn't then maybe the situation wouldn't evolve the way it did. He probably thinks he could have destroyed that factory super fast if he just wasn't so obssessed with flame-flame fruit.

Nami seems to get it. First it was Zoro who understood how surprisingly important this thing is for Luffy, now Nami understood it as well. And Nami helps Luffy come up with the best option: how to not destroy Law's plan any further by making sure they have the winning hand, because at the end of the day, that's the most important thing, right? Law wanted to keep Momo, Caesar and Smiles away from Doflamingo, so even if anything else about the plan fails, they will make sure this part succeeds no matter what.

Nami does it for Luffy, not for Law, because she realized Luffy cares a lot. She's always there supporting his decisions and wishes, no matter how reckless they are, even if they scare her, just like she does when she's navigating: making sure her skills will bring them anywhere Luffy wants and needs to go. She does the same for him here, just on different level: navigating the plan.

For Luffy, respecting Law's wishes and goals is important. He doesn't want another Ace scenario in which Law sacrifices everything, his dreams, people important to him, his ambitions, just to keep Luffy safe. Those two truly understand each other on a very intimate level, it seems.

And so Luffy makes his decision. Keeping Law safe is more important than sticking to the original plan, but he will leave it up to his crewmates to gather the scattered pieces together so that Law's wishes are fullfilled. He entrusts that with them, meanwhile focusing on what he wants to do the most. And what's that again? Helping Rebecca? Destroying factory? Exposing the darkness of Dressrosa and beating Mingo? Oh no, wait. He says it here: to get Torao back.

Are you disgusted already? I am a bit lol <3

Luffy worrying for his crewmates. On the surface level, nothing unusual right? Because he cares for them, it's to be expected. Except Luffy never worries for them, instead he trusts them. In Punk Hazard when his crew barely made it to escape the gas he didn't worry openly like that, he trusted in his crewmates instead. Usopp even points it out that he wishes Luffy sometimes didn't have that much faith in them, because it can get overwhelming how he needs to meet up his expectations.

But here instead Luffy just worries about his crew. Must be because now, after seeing Law defeated by Mingo, he takes his words about how strong Mingo is even more seriously than before. He believes Law to be so strong after all. He doesn't even have to face Doffy himself to know what Law's defeat means. He's willing to take a bet based on someone else's experience, which is also rather unusual in Luffy's case - he normally always needs to test things out himself, doesn't believe other people's opinions or rumours. Again Law proves to be a rare exception.

I dunno how you all feel about this panel, but seems for Luffy, shit just got very personal. In the frame before (I won't put it here because it takes full page) we see three figures: Toy Soldier (symbolizing Franky's wish to help tontattas with the rebellion), Rebecca (Luffy's debt over the food) and Law. Those are the three reasons that push Luffy to make his decision. He wants to beat Mingo's ass for all of those reasons: because his crewmates want to, because he wants to help Rebecca and... because he wants to get payback in Law's stead. I mean, why else would Law be one of Luffy's reasons here? Beating up Mingo was still not part of Law's plan, so he's not doing it to respect Law's wishes in any way. No, if someone messes with Luffy's crewmate, then they mess up with Luffy, that's just how shit goes.

Wait, didn't you mean to write "friend"? Law isn't Luffy's crewmate! We will get to it in part 2 ;)

Now, after finding out about Sabo being still alive, Luffy can't stop crying or calm himself at all. Zoro's getting super annoyed with him, scolding him, hitting him and nothing works UNTIL he drops Torao's name. Suddenly Luffy gets his shit back together enough to actually say what? "I'll save Torao!" geezas so gross Even his face grows more determined. Reuninting with Sabo was important, but so is saving Torao. They're probably on same level in Luffy's mind and that alone is honestly insane to think about.

Damn, seeing how this post covered only 30 chapters, you can all expect there will be like 3 more parts just focused on Dressrosa alone.

Do let me know if you got convinced with my analysis or not :) or do you still think Luffy didn't care even for a moment about Law and his plan in Dressrosa?

[asthedeathoflight]

Rembrandt is sooo the props character of all time. She needs Objects. She doesn't have a lot of lines so you need to give her stuff to be doing in the background. Obviously she's got her bag that has her spray paint and Ajax's gin in it but we can go farther. First order of business I think we introduce Rembrandt at the top of the show wearing a hat. I think in reality Rembrandt is a baseball cap woman but im a lighting designer so im not putting a baseball cap on stage. We can give her like a beanie or smth. She loses the hat during Leave The Bronx Alive when one of the Turnbull ACs almost gets her but misses by an inch.

This is played a little bit for comedy because, like, the Hat Character just lost their Hat, but Rembrandt just keeps running which is a little bit jarring because the usual punchline is that the Hat Character goes back for the hat. So it establishes the stakes a little bit there that theyre in real danger, that that was a real near-miss. Even though theyre laughing on the train, they're not unscathed. Cleon is gone, and the Hat Character has suddenly and unceremoniously lost her Hat. (As a habitual beanie wearer with thick hair myself, this also means Rembrandt's hair is fucked up, so fun little business of someone fixing it for her on the train)

Another prop related thing thats bugged me for a while is what happens to the baseball bat Ajax steals from the Furies. This is something I was originally considering for writing a fic (is it just assault, or assault with a deadly weapon?) but I think the text points towards her not having it on her when she goes after Barnes. Which is weird, right, because Ajax is the one who complains about being unarmed, so why would she abandon it in between Sick of Runnin' and Park At Night? But it makes sense that she wouldn't bring it with her when she approaches Barnes bc that kind of ruins the whole getting the jump on him thing she's going for. So she has to hand it off to someone. And we know who the last Warrior she speaks to before she approaches him is. So thats prop moment #2, Ajax starting to approach Barnes before Rembrandt makes her third attempt to get her to stay, Ajax turning back and handing her the bat and saying "go ahead, I'ma be alright."

And so now Rembrandt has the bat and its an object she can't easily put in her bag or anything so thats more fun prop work for her, because shes gotta be holding it. Lots to work with there. Is she holding it as a weapon, interpreting it as a /replacement/ for Ajax to keep her safe? Or is she holding it with a grip more like she'd use to hold a bottle or a paint can, unused to the posture of violence and in some way stubbornly holding onto the idea that she's carrying it /for/ Ajax, until Ajax catches up with them. But hey! It sure comes in handy with the Bizzies!

And you know how I feel about theater as an art. It's gotta be poetry, it has to rhyme. Near the end of the scuffle with the Bizzies, one of them knocks Rembrandt's bat out of her hands. And the thing is, she could keep running. She has a line to the window. She could just get the fuck out of there. Rembrandt was introduced to us at the top of the show as a Hat Character who looked over her shoulder for her hat when she lost it but kept running for the train. (for the people who were with her on that train but aren't with her now) And, like, its not even actually Ajax's baseball bat. She stole it. She had it for like what, twenty minutes? Rembrandt has probably had it for longer just counting the train ride to Union Square. But the last time she touched Ajax was when they both had their hands on it. So she goes back for the bat.

[ezra-editss]

Just watched X-men Apocalypse. What the hell.

Okay, so I kinda have a take on all this and idk if that's just how it feels to me, but that's what I wanna know. (I don't think this actually happened, but it's the vibes it is all giving)

So it started when I told my mom about First Class (keep reading I'm gonna get to apocalypse eventually) and we came to the conclusion that it feels like they wrote the script, looked at it again and thought:

"Hmm, this seems pretty gay.. Erik and Charles both have no female love interests and they have those lines that seem pretty romantic. Also, Erik seems almost obsessed with Charles at the end with how overprotective he is. Let's fix that!"

And then they gave both of them a kiss with a woman they weren't interested in and added the line "We're brothers, you and I" and then were proud of how well they "saved" it.

And then they made Days of Future Past and didn't even think of it, but when it came out they saw how people were shipping it and then they were like "oh shitt"

And in the first hour of the movie, I thought they were just doing all of this stuff to "erase" any potential gayness people thought there was and wanted to make sure nobody got the wrong idea about the recent movies. But it was more the reminder they like women, before the EXTREME GAYNESS in the second half.

(This is getting so much more unserious than initially intended💀)

Anyways, Apocalypse.

Either I missed something or Erik settling down and HIDING makes NO SENSE. In the last timeline it was 100% clear that he'd never stop believing in what he did, he would never stop fighting his war. So yes, this is a different timeline, but there is no reason given why he suddenly decides to try Charles way. He failed in Days of Future Past and Charles let him go, but there is no way that's enough. And they played this off like that isn't the thing they both wanted since forever and never seemed possible. Being on the same side. Erik switching to Charles side is insane, why wouldn't he talk to Charles in all those years then?

I can't believe they threw away everything that IS Erik, just so he had a reason to be angry enough to join the guy.

(They also died in such a weird/lame way)

And Charles and I still don't really know her name😭.. I have to admit the scenes where Charles was nervous were cute, but that's just because Charles is adorable. But in First Class she was obviously only there for the plot, in Days of Future Past, she wasn't even mentioned and in Apocalypse, she was, again, only there for the plot. She literally doesn't say anything the entire movie after the beginning. She has like two lines. And in the end fight, she's just standing there. And then Charles makes her remember and the flashbacks are soo bad, BC THEY HAD NO MOMENTS. (Especially bc you can compare it to Erik's flashbacks, we're gonna get to that)

(I don't think I have to say it, but to be sure. I have absolutely nothing against straight couples. I don't care if it's gay or not. But if one of them were a woman, I wouldn't be writing this. I just hate how often they prefer to write a heterosexual couple that has no chemistry at all instead of making the two guys/girls kiss.)

Let's talk about the ending. Sometimes when I talk about this stuff I'm a little worried that I interpret things wrong bc I want it to be like that and I'm not being objective anymore, but I was proven right so many times in this. When Mystique and Erik kissed in First Class, it felt really weird to me because Erik obviously had no interest in her. (I suppose it was to show her she's beautiful) And that was pretty much proven right when she talks to him and he barely reacts to what she's saying. I also thought that he probably didn't know Charles was dying, bc he wouldn't let that happen. Then Mystique says "Charles" and suddenly he does show a reaction and when she's gone, he has those god damn flashbacks. WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS ISN'T A ROMANTIC PLOT?😭 and then the specific one of Charles turning away and leaving him. (Could be a metaphor for Charles giving up on him) THAT'S WHAT GOT HIM.

And they make it even more clear when Mystique is dying and Erik doesn't react, but when Charles is dying, is when he steps in.

Ending was cute, but damnn the "you can make me do anything" was crazy.

(This turned out soo long, I've never been so obsessed with something.)

[iminyourwallsbabe]

Yk what I feel like I haven't yapped about CaitVi enough and that's a disservice to my fellow sapphics so this word vomit is for you girl kissers out there

Okay so it goes without saying that CaitVi is kind of divisive. Some people love it 100%, some people think it could've worked better under different circumstances, and some people outright hate it, all viewpoints I understand. I'm the type of person who appreciates it for what it is.

I think the first thing I wanna touch on is the idea that their ending was supposed to be a happy one. I don't think it was. Honestly, I think it was more of a pause than anything. You weren't supposed to go "oh yay good for them", you were supposed to wonder what happens now. The end gives us, and the characters, an opportunity to just get our shit together and move on. So much just happened, there was little time to really, deeply think about it all. I'd like to think that they did work their shit out post-canon. However, I can see why people would think they wouldn't have.

I'm gonna go reverse chronological here. So one of the more glaring issues is whether or not Caitlyn switching sides was authentic and came from a place of genuine understanding of her mistakes. In my opinion, not quite. She was getting there but it would take the final battle for it to really set it. I said this in another post, but when she's sitting there before Ambessa, gun to the back of her head and knife in her side, she looks terrified. Obviously that shit is scary but it's more than that. Caitlyn is more afraid of dying than ever before, because if she died then, that would mean she had no way to fix what she had done. It was setting in just how badly she fucked up and now the entire world is at stake, and what can she do? Nothing. Think back to season 1 when her biggest gripe was not being allowed to do anything substantial or important. It's this again, just more extreme. She wanted to help people then, now she needs to and she can't.

And I think that's what she needed. She has never really been on the receiving end of the consequences of her actions. Not until then. As we've seen in the early parts of season 2, it weighs on her heavy when she thinks she's made a grave error. That's why she even started acting up in the first place. She's willing to abandon all of her morals and growth for the sake of remedying what she thinks she did. So with that in mind, I can imagine when she goes back to Vi, she feels the same if not worse because this time, what happened was actually her fault.

But now we need to talk about Vi and her place in all of this. One of many people's complaints is that Vi folds so easily when it comes to Caitlyn. And you're right, she folds like a fucking napkin but that's not just "oh I'm in love so I'm gonna do whatever for my girlfriend", it's more than that and has nothing to do with Caitlyn specifically. First of all, she has been stuck in Stillwater since she was a teen and hasn't seen the light of day in 7 years. MIND YOU, when she went to jail she was separated from her sister, who at that moment was her only living family member. OH YEAH DID WE FORGET THAT HER ENTIRE FAMILY DIED IN FRONT OF HER THAT SAME NIGHT? It is not a surprise to me at all that she clung to Caitlyn like saran wrap. That tends to happen when you're that fucking lonely. I'm of the belief that it could've been any other woman in the world instead of Caitlyn and she still would've acted the same. I also think that's part of the reason she joined the enforcers. Vi probably thought she was going to lose Caitlyn if she didn't. That doesn't really have anything to do with Caitlyn, that's an internal thing. Again though, are we really surprised that she'd get that desperate? But wait! There's more. After she does join and she tries to call Caitlyn out when she's done too much, it goes very wrong. It's at this point that some people wonder why she didn't just go back to Ekko instead of acting like she was all she had left. I need y'all to be so fr, you think Ekko would've been cool with that? And don't say "oh but he's so forgiving to Jinx" or something, that's just not true. He knows she's dangerous to the people of Zaun and can't personally allow that in his space or his life. It doesn't make it hurt any less but he's very clearly not having that shit. The same would've happened with Vi. She would've came back, he would've been like "I love you but FUCK NAH", and season 2 would've been exactly the same. She would've had to do some serious convincing.

But I say that to say that realistically, Caitlyn was all she had. She couldn't go back home after doing what she did, she definitely couldn't go to Jinx, everybody else is dead, that was it for her. Now we're in the glorious crash out era. I think there's something to be said about the glimpses of Caitlyn we get in that sequence. Those were hallucinations, going off of the fact that Jinx has her own and that more than likely, they share some of the same underlying mental illnesses. Breaking up with Caitlyn like that probably set it off. The straw was starting to break the camel's back. I also think it's interesting how Caitlyn left Vi similarly to how Vi (technically)left Jinx and that's when these issues start. I think it was a good way of showing that Caitlyn was right in a misguided sort of way. It is her blood in her veins. She is not that far off from Jinx, and they both can sit there and go "oh yeah she's crazy" all they want but Vi and Caitlyn were both one or two crash outs away from being like her. If anything, you can argue they kind of got there. Both of their ways of dealing with their pain involved hurting people. Caitlyn with her military dictatorship and attempted mass murder, Vi with her pit fighting, it's not at all the same in severity but conceptually... yeah, all of y'all are of fucked up.

You know I sometimes made jokes about how Caitlyn looks like Vi's mom and kind of acts like Jinx/Powder and how Freud would've had a field day with that but that's not exactly what's happening. I mean the mom thing is still a little sus but like I said before, they both have Jinx tendencies. If anything, Vi sees a reflection of herself in Caitlyn, because one of the big differences between the three of them is that what Vi and Caitlyn do is controlled. Caitlyn enacts violence through military means and generally gets permission to do the things that she does. Vi fights in a pit, that's the time and place for that. Jinx kind of does whatever she wants, except for when her mind/body makes decisions for her. She goes into panic mode and she shoots something, it's almost a natural instinct. If it's not that, it's kind of just "I felt like it". Also, their fears are coming from slightly different places and manifest in different ways. Jinx doesn't trust anyone to stick around, so she tests them and pushes them away. Vi doesn't trust anyone to stick around so she does whatever she can to keep them with her. Caitlyn doesn't trust herself to keep the people she loves around, so she becomes overly protective of them. Are we seeing what I'm saying here? It's like a hall of mirrors with these three but we're not here to talk about their relationship to Jinx, we're here to talk about them.

With this in mind, let's talk about the Fantastic CaitVi Coping and Communication Skills!!!! So the first thing they do when they join sides again is just be freaky as fuck. Like you think Vi spitting on her was a necessary part of the plan? Hell nah! Like honestly you could shoot a hole through the sexual tension between them good lord. Some people argue that the sex scene was unnecessary but looking at how they were acting before that? I'm not surprised that it went the way it did. Jokes aside though, seriously, the fact that they hadn't really addressed what happened properly and just went straight to pound town is so painfully on brand for both of them. Neither of them are good at addressing their issues. Post breakup, Vi became an emo alcoholic and Caitlyn became a whole ass dictator, I don't think they were gonna sit down and talk about their feelings. And honestly, I don't think that closure mattered nearly as much to them as it does to us as the audience. They have bigger issues, yk, like the glorious evolution and all that. Do I think that's necessarily a good thing? No. Do I think it's in character? Very. Anyway, this is why Vi is like "Cait, I don't fucking care" when she tries to begin saying anything about what she did when they were apart. She doesn't fucking care. Not at all. That's not what's important to her in that moment. It's also interesting that the first thing Caitlyn tries to apologize for is for sleeping with another woman, not trying to kill a whole bunch of her people. Notice how she went for the small thing first? She doesn't want to think about the other stuff. Neither of them do. And so they do what they do best and found a totally unhealthy distraction. In this case, it's ✂️🧁.

I think as a fandom we put too much emphasis on what's healthy in a show full of the most insane people I've ever seen. Trying to find a perfectly healthy relationship in this show is like trying to find a super niche website from 2003. You could probably do it but oh my fucking god would it take you a while. And y'all don't have nearly this much to say about Jayvik even though bro was like "ppl from the undercity are dangerous!!!" right to Viktor's face. Not to mention all the other issues they got going on. Jayce straight up killed a child with Hextech, like let's be fr. They're not all sunshine and rainbows and if we're going to criticize CaitVi the way that we do, we gotta have the same energy for Jayvik.

Anyway, I say all that to say that it's hard to focus on what the most therapist approved decision for your relationship is in these conditions and it doesn't make a ship any worse because of that.

I also don't like the idea that it's too unhealthy to be functional. It has the potential to get better and it's implied by the ending that it does, or at least starts to. Think about it like this, if two people on opposite sides of the political spectrum are friends, what do you assume is actually happening there? One party has to be compromising on their beliefs. There's no other way. If you cared so strongly about something, it'd be hard to keep company that opposes it. It's like that with CaitVi. They were on two different sides of a war and Caitlyn had to shift what she believed in order to even befriend Vi let alone be her lover. That whole "oh ur all the same" bit had to go. If anything, it makes me believe that end of season 2 CaitVi is actually healthier than season 1 CaitVi on a fundamental level. Caitlyn's view of Zaunites by the end of season 1 is attached to Vi. Vi was one of the good ones, Vi proved that there was some hope for those people, Vi was an exception. This is why she got so mad in season 2 when Vi tried to tell her she was bugging out. That's why she says "it's her blood in your veins" with so much vitriol. She gets indirectly victimized by a Zaunite, who has already been established as an extremist, and all of a sudden everybody down there is bad again. If you care about them at all you're bad too. At the end of season 2, Caitlyn is amused when she notices that Jinx is still alive. If that doesn't say anything about how much she's developed I don't know what does. Even if she doesn't like her, she doesn't have that same blind hatred anymore and that's the part we have to pay attention to. She's gotten to a point where she thinks even Jinx should have the opportunity to have a second chance. I'd rather date that than Caitlyn "wait you don't have parents?" Kiramman.

That's basically it, shout out to the writers for actually knowing how classism/racism/all the isms tbh actually work and what it looks like to change your beliefs as a a beneficiary of those systems, goodnight

[gaykarstaagforever]

TAS "Yesteryear"

I'm going to give a full plot synopsis with spoilers, here, because you're not going to ever watch this.

The plot of this one is that the Federation decides that screwing around some more with the Guardian on the Edge of Forever is a good idea. This despite how the last time they did this, High McCoy and Kirk's penis almost helped the Nazis win WWII. But Harlan Ellison didn't write this episode, so it will probably go a bit better.

Kirk, Spock and McCoy are again tasked to go through it, I guess because they're basically the experts on it? (Though McCoy was high at the time, so) They explore various times we don't get to see, including up to a mere 30 years earlier, for whatever reason anyone in the Federation needs to do that. When they get back, no one remembers who Spock is except Spock and Kirk, and the Science Officer aboard the Enterprise is an Andorian.

(The naked bird-person is Aleek-Om, an Aurelian Federation historian, because this is animated so we can have fun things like this. He doesn't really do anything, but it's the thought that counts. ...Also don't confuse the Aurelians with the El-Aurians, which is Guinan's race. Keep up, nerds.)

If no one remembers Spock and he was never aboard the Enterprise, that means that, despite being super-careful, Kirk and Co. have clearly changed the timeline AGAIN. So they look up Spock back on the Enterprise and find out that, while he WAS a person in this timeline, he DIED when he was 7. Also his mother later blew up in a shuttle accident. Just to rub it in.

That's when Spock randomly remembers that time he was 7 and the Vulcans made him battle giant monsters in the desert, because these people are real weird to their kids. He nearly died, but he was saved by his adult cousin, who, now that he thinks about it, looked suspiciously like Spock as an adult! But because Spock went back in time to the same time, but at another place, that deleted Adult Spock from 30 years ago on Vulcan, so Little Spock got eaten by Battle Cat.

Obviously, the only way to fix this is to send Spock back to 30 years ago on Vulcan, so he can be where he's supposed to be to save himself as a child, restoring the time paradox they accidentally time-paradoxed into another, different, time paradox.

Yeah. It's one of these.

Btw, this will "kill" the Andorian guy by restoring the previous timeline. But he tells Spock that Andorians value family above all else, so he's fine with dying if Spock gets his mom back. ...It kind of doesn't matter, because they were totally going to do this either way, but, thanks anyway, guy no one knows or cares about.

So Spock goes to Vulcan, 30 years ago. Which is the coolest part of the episode, because we actually get to see Vulcan, in all it's early 70s glory.

Pretending to be his own adult cousin, Spock goes to the home of Sarek and Amanda, where he witnesses Little Spock being bullied by the other little Vulcans for being half-human.

And they dressed the Vulcan kids like this in 1973, for reasons forever lost to time.

Sarek sees this happen too, but he lets it happen, then chastises Spock for being too emotional when he fights back and then cries about it. Because Sarek absolutely sucks as a father.

Not that Amanda is better as a mother. She's constant pressuring Spock to ignore Sarek and be more human. It's no wonder this guy has some dark stuff going on inside him.

Fuck the both of you, honestly.

Little Spock gets mad, because who wouldn't?, and decides to prove his Vulcan mettle by running out into the desert BEFORE his scheduled trial. Spock forgot that he did that, so wasn't prepared to follow him, so gets a late start going after him.

...Which is just enough time for Little Spock and his pet sehlat (yes, as mentioned in "Journey to Babel") to get attacked. The sehlat - who was actually Sarek's pet before Spock's and so is pretty old - manages to defend Little Spock long enough for Spock to get there and neck-pinch Battle Cat to death (I won't show you Spock strangling a tiger to death; the show, however, absolutely does).

But now the sehlat is dying of a toxic wound. Little Spock decides to go get a healer from the city to save it, and Spock says sure, me at 7, run across this vast desert hell by yourself to get the guy, I'll stay here and watch your beloved pet die.

Little Spock finds the healer, convinces him this isn't Little Spock pranking him again, and this guy flies them back out to the desert in his pink rocket car.

The healer looks at the sehlat and says he can't save it, it's too late. All he can do is treat it enough to keep it alive for awhile, but it will be in constant pain.

Spock, proving he takes after his father as a parental figure, convinces his child self that he should stop moping about his dying pet, man up, and let the healer euthanize it. Little Spock agrees, the healer KILLS THE GIANT LOVING TEDDY BEAR, and they all go back to the city.

Little Spock appears stoic now, doubtlessly in shock from the trauma. But both Spock and Sarek count this as a Vulcan win, and Spock comes back to the present, the timeline now restored.

DC Fontana wrote this, so it's as good as this material could possibly be. And the characterization of Spock and his parents is totally consistent with who they were in TOS, so that's okay. Unfortunately, that just makes them all look like cruel jackasses. Maybe that's just my human bias talking, but goddammit, guys. Vulcans are dicks. No wonder McCoy is always yelling slurs.

I still like this. It's a very DS9 / Voyager way of showing alien cultures, in that, yes, okay, everyone is actually pretty messed up, and no one has a perpetual moral high ground. It's just jarring to see that out of a TOS-era childrens' cartoon.

One that features half-naked children as racist bullies, and kills both a big snuggly dog-bear and a Space cat. Like, pump the breaks, 1973. This is probably why Gen X is like that.

Also Spock misremembering stuff that happened to him when he was 7 makes logical sense. But in the context of the show, it sort of makes him look like a moron who isn't taking this that seriously. Which is weird, because the whole reason he's doing any of this is to stop himself and his mother from being dead.

But the guy is CLEARLY a ball of unresolved childhood trauma, so maybe that explains it. How Gen X of him.

[eriexplosion]

The thing is that the finale isn't even good outside of lack of addressing Tech. It just is bad all around. It's a bad episode that doesn't follow any of the established set up for season 3.

We started the CX subplot in season 2, and then spent 3 long episodes with CX-2 in particular. This apparently was... just to set up a big boss fight in the finale and for nothing else? We spent four whole episodes across two seasons on this and had several other set up moments! For a big shootout and nothing else?

And yes, the CX-2 is Tech implications is a big part of this. Some of them even remained in the episode. How else are we supposed to take Hemlock's line "The last time we crossed paths, you had just lost a member of your squad. And it appears history may repeat itself. CT-9904 resisted my conditioning in the past, but I've made alterations to my methods. If you all survive, you will make fine operatives." other than that he used those 'alterations' to successfully CX Tech? Literally thought that was what it was setting up before *waves hand*

The Zillo beast was used to rip open a hole in the wall so that the Hunter, Wrecker, and Crosshair can get inside. It served no other purpose and walked away.

We spent two full episodes on the m-count plot between Bad Territory and The Harbinger. This accomplishes nothing in the entire rest of the season.

We spent all season dealing with Crosshair's hand tremors, establishing they are a psychological response to trauma. So should we... emotionally deal with that trauma? NOPE. WE'RE CUTTING IT OFF. DONE.

A small thread was set up that no one is beyond redemption/help, we see Rex reaching out to a CX, we see Omega remind Crosshair that Ventress deserves the chance to change, and in the finale... NO ONE is given a chance to change other than Emerie, who already did last episode. Every CX and commando is shot down without remorse even though they're also victims of Hemlock.

In general we just have action interspersed with the scraps of what was probably a united plot at one point. There isn't even a cavalry arrives moment in The Cavalry Has Arrived. What happened here?

The thing is I can see two subplots that would have united ALL of these that almost feel like they've been scraped out and replaced with generic shooting and a generic and undefined 'and then they had a happy ending'

First there's the force sensitivity plot. This was actually set up as early as season one episode one, when Omega takes the shot at Crosshair and manages to stop him from shooting, and then elaborated on throughout when she connects easily with animals, leading up to Bad Territory and The Harbinger - where we see Ventress tame a large, angry creature through the force. So much is made of the beast taming angle.

And obviously we have a beast. The Zillo beast. Omega does not at any point interact with this giant creature to calm it down or do anything at all she just lets it loose to rip some stuff up, have some action sequences, and then walk away into the night. But these two things united would have brought all the moments of force sensitivity hints home, as well as tied in her biggest strength - her empathy and caring. Taming the zillo beast would have been the end result of her character arc and made all that set up go somewhere instead of trailing off vaguely.

And second we have the CX plot. This could have tied in the remaining dropped threads of making the CX set up matter at all, the CX-2 is Tech hinting throughout the season, Crosshair's hand tremors, and the thread of redemption and no one being beyond saving. CX-2 is Tech, reach out to him, bring him back and through that Crosshair addresses his trauma by starting to fix one of the consequences of his biggest mistake - going back to the Empire in the first place. It wouldn't fix his tremors entirely but would help reduce them, be a huge step on the path to recovery and a great note to end his arc on.

With these two subplots, instead of endless excuses for more action and grunting, everything gets pulled together for a finale that has actual emotional significance, and the thing is that all the pieces are there so what the hell happened to make absolutely none of them come together and instead it just turns into an action shoot out?

[schizosamwincester]

You know... I've said many times that Dean has no idea that romantic attraction is even real, but upon further reflection, I think I was wrong.

Dean is extremely self-aware. It's easy to forget that he knows about his problems and bad coping mechanisms and general neuroses because he generally doesn't do anything to fix them, but he absolutely does know about them. Here. Have some quotes to prove it:

No Exit (2x06):

Jo, you've got options. No one in their right mind chooses this life. My dad started me in this when I was so young... I wish I could do something else.

Jump the shark (4x19):

You know, I finally get why you [Sam] and Dad butted heads so much. You two were practically the same person. I mean, I worshipped the guy, you know? I dressed like him, I acted like him, I listen to the same music. But you were more like him than I will ever be. And I see that now.

The End (5x04):

I was wrong. Dean. I was wrong. I'm begging you. Say yes. But you won't. 'Cause I didn't. Because that's just not us, is it?

There are definitely more, but these were the ones that were easiest to find because I wrote "self-aware" in my notes.

Dean has a lot of time to think. He routinely drives for twelve hours straight. He keeps a lot of his baggage to himself, and that means the thoughts are stuck rattling around in his brain instead. He can examine himself and his feelings and his problems over and over and over again. Just because he doesn't cope with them the way someone who's having these revelations in a therapy session would doesn't mean that he hasn't figured them out.

So with all that in mind, with how well Dean does actually understand himself... Why wouldn't he have noticed that he views sex and romance in a fundamentally different way than the people around him? The two biggest figures in his life, Sam and John, both loved women so much that they went on massive revenge quests after they died. They let their romantic love for people who were already dead completely uproot their lives. Surely Dean has noticed he's never felt that way about anyone, not even the hookups and situationships he liked the most.

Dean knows who he is. He knows that he's the hookup guy. He avoids baggage, strings, and feelings at every opportunity. It would make a lot of sense for him to do that because he's figured out that he just doesn't feel the same way about women as they usually do about him.

Dean Winchester is Dean Winchester on purpose. It's easy to forget that when you're someone who would never choose to be like that, but he very much did. So even if he does not have the vocabulary that we do and thus can't explicitly call himself aro, it makes sense for him to have created the "love 'em and leave 'em" part of his persona precisely because he knows he doesn't have romantic feelings towards anyone.

All that said, the pace at which he accepts it is definitely variable. He obviously knows he isn't interested in romance right from when we meet him in Season One, but he might not have come to the realization that other people actually are. It is probably a revelation that happens in stages, and I think there's a lot of wiggle room for when those happen and how he comes to terms with it. There's time for denial (I've definitely felt things for women, actually) and bargaining (other people can't possibly feel all that) and all that jazz.

The main thing is that I have absolutely said in the past that "Dean Winchester dies without ever learning that romantic attraction is real," and I do not believe that anymore. He may be stubborn, and he may not tend to actually change his behaviors, but he is too self aware to not have noticed them.

[atapilled]

Analysis on Amanda and Wooly's relationship

Even though Amanda and Wooly are the most popular characters of ATA, actually the only ones the fandom cares about, they are VERY watered down. So I'm here to talk about them more deeply, because their relationship is the most interesting thing in this game to me ! (⁎˃ᴗ˂⁎)

Let's start with their history, what even happened for them to end up this way?

Well, Amanda mentions that she used to trust Wooly. When Amanda asks Riley "Who's someone you trust?", if they answer with "Wooly", Amanda will say " I felt that way a long time ago, too". So they weren't always like this. Since things about them are currently unknown, a lot of this is gonna be logic.

First off, when they first came here, the moment they met, they became eachothers.. Well, basically everything. They only had eachother and were each others only comfort from then on, so they most likely became very dependent on eachother, not to mention they basically grew up together. But then, Wooly did something that made Amanda not trust him anymore. Their trust was broken, which meant from then on their life would become even worse than it already was, because they lost (in a way) the only person they had. Whatever it was that Wooly did hurt Amanda BADLY as we've seen how she acts to him, but it also wasn't intentional. (Again, let's use logic. You are stuck with someone, only them, and you possibly will be for your whole life. You would wanna be their friend, build trust etc, you obviously wouldn't wanna hurt them as they are your only hope. This person is also a 5 year old child, lost just like you. Makes sense not to hurt them, right?). The problem is that Amanda was already traumatized and had trust issues, so forgiving Wooly wasn't all that easy, and so instead of her best friend he is now something to lash out on. He is noticeably trying to fix whatever it is that he did (almost never complains to Amanda, follows her orders and helps her, ignores her mistakes including her literal attempted murder on him, etc). That's exactly how you act when you wanna desperately fix something, you do everything they want you to and let them do anything to you, and think "maybe pleasuring them will fix this", which didn't work with Amanda. They do still have some happy and wholesome moments together which probably show how they both do want those old times back, but what's done is done.

Onto them now, after it all happened. They have complete opposite views of eachother.

Amanda sees Wooly as a nuisance. Someone who's there to bother her, annoy her, someone she just wants gone. Nothing but someone to lash out on to her. Every chance she gets, she puts him down in some way, constantly hurts him... She also makes some jokes about wanting him dead ("Hmm.. Maybe i should get him to come back") and after his death ("Haha, yeah! If you can find him~"). No empathy towards him, EVER. Also, she finds being scared of him an extremely hilarious concept. He's just a joke to her. Basically, pure hatred with an occasional "fine, you're not that bad".

Wooly on the other hand views Amanda as his best friend, someone he can trust.. Just a good person in general, even though she has done nothing but hurt him. He relies on trying to understand her instead of judging her ("I understand, Amanda"), wants to help her, follows her around even though he doesn't have to be there nor does Amanda want him to be there, he is too trusting to her (taking the obviously suspicious drink before she drvgs him).. Just continues on with her like nothing ever happened, like they're still best friends. Could be his way of coping along with trying to fix his mistake. He even focuses more on Amanda's well-being than his own (when in the LITERAL BUTCHERS SHOP, he looks way more worried about Amanda and doesn't even mention himself, also constantly warning Amanda about dangerous stuff and not actually being worried about his own safety). Whenever he gets angry, he immediately regrets it. When Amanda is sad, normally it's either he's also sad or trying to comfort her, he has both alot of sympathy and empathy for Amanda despite everything. (Btw a little opinion/theory of mine is that Wooly is jealous of Riley because of their relationship with Amanda - Riley makes a mistake, they are forgiven. Wooly is blamed. Riley makes Amanda happy, they are thanked and appreciated, but Wooly can never seem to do it. In the story tape, he might just be mad because he's jealous of Riley, they helped again while he tried but nothing worked.)

Also they need eachother whether they like if or not. Humans will go insane without human contact and eachother is all they have, so even though it makes them both feel worse, they need eachother. I mean just look at Amanda, she already says she feels very alone and scared, so just imagine how she'd be without Wooly, even though she hates him.

A little about their way of trying to get out or something..? Idk how to say it. But basically, they have different views on what they should do (this is a theory, i guess?)

Amanda thinks that they have a better chance of escaping by telling everything they can. She tries to tell us what's happening, and when she gets stopped, she uses metaphors. She thinks that the more they say, the higher the chances of them getting out. She doesn't think about the consequences that might cause (she often does and talks without thinking about the consequences, as shown in the tape where she sends Kate a gift).

Wooly's view is that they have to say the least they can, or else something will happen. He thinks they're still being watched, there will be huge consequences to them saying what's happening, speaking up, so he tries to keep quiet. He's probably right, as they do get stopped and hurt when they try to say something anyways (Amanda flinches at the static and is forced to not say whatever she wanted to). So instead he just waits for something to happen.

With these they go against eachother, which causes them to fight.. Again.

Here's some extra thingies/details about them ☆

⤷ they both share a fear of the butcher

⤷ in ATA2, Wooly gets super defensive and flinches alot more compared to ATA1 even when Amanda doesn't necessarily mean to hurt him or is even being playful, as a result from Amanda attempting to end him

⤷ they both fear the dark (implied for Wooly)

⤷ when Wooly starts speaking, sometimes Amanda seems interested i what he's going to say, thinking he might have a good idea. She quickly gets disappointed though

⤷ if you choose to help Amanda in the hospital tape, Wooly will try to grab her arm before blacking out :(

⤷ when the entity appears, Wooly gets kinda.. "Shut down"? I'm assuming by Amanda since she can control him. I wonder why she doesn't let him see her entity...

(I also forgot to mention that Amanda can "delete" Wooly whenever she wants, yet he's still there and she doesn't do much about it.. Infact, even when he's very annoying, she rarely uses her ability to make him go away. Hmm..)

There are probably things i forgot to say since i know alot and i always forget to write something in the end.. Eh, whatever. Bye !!!

[eww-y-tho]

The hypothetical debates surrounding the whole "Lady and Lord Whistledown" vs "Colin and Penelope Bridgerton" make me wither because

Lady and Lord Whistledown.

I'm telling you, this shit would be so fucking funny. I can picture it in my mind's eye: Bridgerton season 4, we get a quick shot of Colin and Penelope talking shit and giggling like crazy in the background, maybe with some PDA to match because Colin can't keep his hands off her, only to hear a male voice actor of a similar calibre to our angel Julie Andrews join in sometimes while Charlotte picks up the paper and cackles. Obviously, the reveal would happen, but I want to believe that our Queen would be down for Whistledown to continue as long as it doesn't get too personal. It would be kind of unfair and a bit indicative of the period, monarchy and all, but Charlotte being in on it would amp up the comedy points. Plus some ~historical cultural commentary~ would just be that final flavouring of spice.

It would kind of feel like Colin's turning to the dark side because we've already seen quite a few scenes where he seems possessed by Lady Whistdown's attitude and I love the idea of him coming from hating Lady Whistledown's guts to protecting her and joining in because it's fun and it activated his little shit reflex. Plus the subtextual implications of just how much Colin and Penelope actually are best friends and are connected beyond normalcy would just be *chef's kiss*

I would also love it because it feels very partner-in-crime vibes, giving another aspect to their relationship that would be fun to see. Combined with the power Lady Whistledown has on the story, we'd be guaranteed to see our beans quite a lot. Also a "Hello, my Lady," followed by a "Hello, my Lord" after a particularly steamy scene would literally have me shaking crying giggling dancing kicking my feet.

As for Penelope, it honestly depends on how you view her character and her relationship with Lady Whistledown. If the person in question thinks that Lady Whistledown is a vital part of her personality, an aspect of who she is, limiting her by making her quit would just feel really, really sad, man. Lady Whistledown has caused Pen a lot of grief, however, and we see it a lot throughout the story, so I think Colin being there, sharing the secret and partaking would make her feel much more comfortable in her own skin.

Anyway. Love the idea, and would perish if it happened, but probably won't.

Colin and Penelope Bridgerton.

This one's more cute than anything else. Two writers as a couple release solo and joint works sometimes while establishing their reputation as respectable authors and leaving Lady Whistledown behind them. I can see another scene in my mind's eye, Colin and Pen are sitting across from each other on their respective writing desks, writing and then handing each other their work to review and give opinions, paired with a kiss after they start teasing each other about their writing. Considering that the designated Sexy Desk Scene has already been taken, this would have to be in a secluded area or in their bedroom. And then shots of people buying their books and enjoying them would ensue.

With the amount of journals and letters and things Colin's done, he's practically primed for an author's role. Maybe they can be more exposed to Colin's love for travel in this version. Having Penelope with him on his trips while writing their little hearts out would be adorable. Sadly, though, this would mean that they would probably have less screen time.

If you see Lady Whistledown as an outlet for the suffering Penelope was going through throughout the story, she wouldn't need Lady Whistledown anymore and abandon the alias because she's served her purpose as Penelope's coping mechanism, and Colin and Penelope would find their fix through other means. Maybe continuing to gossip but only between the two of them, going back to the beginning of the series and the final link to their relationship.

It's been established over and over again that they both love reading, writing, gossiping, and discussing all things philosophical. And each other for enjoying those qualities. So, I think this dynamic would be particularly interesting because it would be yet another way to connect. They could probably also make each other all hot and bothered by leaving random sexy letters sporadically, which would just be so fitting, tbh. However, that would also work for the Lady and Lord Whistledown dynamic so it's kind of a null point. It would be hot, though.

And, yeah, that's how I see those hypothetical dynamics playing out and how that would affect the characters. But now for the negatives. While I love the Lord Whistledown idea, I do think that Colin is a bit too nice and cute for that, and it would probably be a bit OOC, especially because of his personal experiences with Whistledown, it would be a bit weird if his tune suddenly changed to "yeah, I know gossip can ruin someone's life, but I like it now, so I don't care." But I also just can't fathom Bridgerton without Lady Whistledown, and this idea hinges on literally removing the narrator and source of all the tea, as well as making us lose our angel Julie Andrews. At least the Lady and Lord Whistledown idea fulfills almost all fronts of their relationship dynamic.

Again, as the GIF demonstrates, both are good, and I love both of them for the different ways they would take the characters, but let's be real, a combo would be really fun as well. Like Pen keeps up with Lady Whistledown while Colin writes his own books or smth.

Anyway, enough of my rambling. Bye.

[incorrect-fnaf-quotes]

Rabbit Restoration Project: |8|

The sight... part of it, at least--wasn't what you had expected to find. Nothing like this needs to breath... what's happening?

A part of you felt upset--mainly about the door. How could you get that fixed up? You supposed someone could get called, but... How would I explain it?

'A giant rabbit robot broke through it after I locked him in there. Can you help?' You rolled your eyes slightly. I could say something different... but what?

Another part of you felt scared. What if you approached the rabbit, and he suddenly lashed out--like in the dream? But more because you had trapped him in there, instead.

I don't have anything to use against him... punching or kicking at him probably wouldn't do all that much to a robot, either. At the very least, it could annoy him... which wasn't what you wanted.

If he was already angry, why add even more fuel to the fire?

And another part--far tinier--couldn't help but feel a hint of concern. The rabbit was hyperventilating--whether he actually, truly needed to breath--was he distressed?

It was all followed with a wheeze, too--and was still so raspy and strained. Did something happen with his voice box? There's other damage... practically everywhere.

Slowly, and somewhat hesitantly--even as your mind was giving you alternate solutions--you approached the rabbit, and his ears twitched back and forth.

Obviously having heard you, his head lifted, the half-closed lids that contained gray, glowing eyes staring towards you.

"Are you- HEY!" You yelped.

Before you had the time to finish the question, the rabbit had risen onto his feet, no longer using the edge of the wall as some kind of support, and he rushed forward.

Still breathing heavily--even though, by the time he reached you, it seemed to have slowed--the animatronic stretched his arm as far as it could go and grabbed your shirt's collar.

"Never..." He took in a deep, shaky breath--his words slow and deliberate, like he was trying to make sure you understood. "...Do that again."

"Lock you-? Okay, okay!" You shakily nodded, swallowing with a dry throat, raising a hand to give the rabbit a nervous thumbs up.

For a few seconds, he just seemed to inspect you--before, seemingly satisfied--perhaps with your fear again--the rabbits grip on you became nonexistent. He took a few steps back.

You did, too--taking in a much-needed deep breath, and raising a hand to your chest, as the other gripped your pants tightly.

Your eyes flickered around again--and without the rabbit being in the doorway, or right in front of you, there was something that could easily be noticed.

He hadn't been carrying the other arm--and you assumed that, maybe, once he was freed, the rabbit would simply go back and retrieve it.

The old arm was laying by itself back in The Restoration Room, right on the desk--but just like when it had been on your bed, it looked dangerously close to falling.

"Now... now, will you hear me out, rabbit-"

"Springtrap." The rabbit rasped.

You blinked. "Huh?"

"Springtrap." The rabbit repeated. Although, as he said the word, there was a hint of... hesitance? "Don't just call me "rabbit". It's Springtrap."

"Okay..." You nodded slowly. "Springtrap. I... didn't think that you actually had a name." Or that you could speak until I woke up to see you...

"Of course I have one." He grumbled.

"Right..." There was another nod, and another attempt at clearing your throat. "Now, Springtrap..."

His ears twitched, and he gave a vague gesture for you to continue--to hurry up--like the rabbit was losing his patience.

"About earlier..." You fidgeted with your shirt's collar. "I have to ask... do you plan on leaving? You've been searching through every drawer for awhile."

When Springtrap remained silent for a couple of seconds, you took the time to gesture to the abandoned limb. "I know you want to fix that. And I still took you here to be restored..."

There was a hum from Springtrap, but he said nothing--allowing you to keep going.

"So," You took a few steps forward. "How about the two of us make a little deal? I get to do my original plans with you--and I'll reattach your arm, too, like how you're wanting."

Springtrap leaned forward ever so slightly.

"You... need to let me complete it. Please...?" Your voice grew a little quiet at the end. You'd never dealt with something like this before--but you didn't want to leave it all undone. "Just... for awhile."

"You let me work, and you don't just get up and attack me... no biting I'd...almost definitely taste the worst." There was a quiet, wheezy snicker coming from Springtrap--and you grinned a little at the noise.

At least he seems calm now... Unless his mode completely changed--still enraged over one of the things you did--and started to throw you around or something.

"And then once I'm completed, you can... if you want to leave, then, you can." You rubbed at your eyes a little bit. "Also, another thing, really quick..."

"Can you... please not make more of a mess? There's drawers all over the floor." You requested as politely and calmly as possible. "You were just out on the sidewalk when I found you. This is better, but..."

At the rabbit's stare, you shifted uncomfortably and looked away. "...I need this all to be tidy."

Springtrap, still silent, moved closer to you again--until he was a few inches away from your face--and it felt like he was starting to examine you, maybe.

"Deal?" You whispered, inching backwards.

He grunted, reaching over, and giving your closest shoulder a tiny squeeze. Springtrap moved forwards, bumping into you. He didn't apologize.

Still a bit rude... Turning around, you watched as the rabbit made his way to the door and left--in the direction that didn't lead to the front door.

An eyebrow raised. Was... that a 'yes', then? Did he agree to it? He should still know where the door is...

Turning back around, you made your way through the entryway that led into The Restoration Room--planning on snatching up on the limb, and placing it somewhere else for now.

Doesn't seem like he would want me to work on him right now... You sighed. Or... did he not agree? Is he going to stay if he didn't agree? Or will he leave either way?

So many questions--one that you doubted that you could get an immediate answer to--were bubbling up--and as a new one popped, you groaned and lowered your hand.

You wanted to place the arm somewhere else, and then try to question the rabbit--if he would actually answer, and if he were in the mood to begin with--but...

The drawers. You huffed. I should go and deal with those first...

@mcfries123 @ravenmccookies @spaciebabie

[emo-trash101]

Guys I don't know if you can tell but slow burn is actually not my strong suit

Home is Where the Heart is

Pt 4

Daisuke x Male! Reader

Pronouns: second person, implied male

Word count: 1k+

TW: People going insane, Jimmy, murder/death, general mouthwashing stuff, internalized homophobia (this is just generally for the whole series)

Day 64

It took a whole day of coming up with a good excuse as to why your door was now broken, and sufficient begging to get Swansea to come fix it. The second part was probably because he knew he would have to bring Daisuke along with, and that Daisuke would likely spend the whole time talking to you.

Swansea never was stupid, and you know that just as well as everyone else. But the way he talked about you and Daisuke's friendship, like it was something more than just that, it made you think he was stupid. You weren't gay, and you knew it, why couldn't anyone else?

But that led you to where you are now, sitting on your bed silently while Daisuke is talking to you about how far he is in the game he's playing currently (even though by this point he's played through it 4-5 times at least), and Swansea grumbling at Daisuke to pay attention and actually do his work.

"Hey, lay off him a little bit." You say halfheartedly, trying your best not to notice the way Daisuke's face lights up when you defend him. "I will the second he actually does some work." Swansea says, somehow being passive aggressive and just aggressive at the same time.

Either way, Daisuke looks at you, a smile on his face. "Thanks!" He whispers, trying to be hushed, but you both know that his concept of volume control is completely and utterly non-existent. You nod, trying your best to not make eye contact with him again.

It hurts to look him in the face, this feeling boiling up inside of you. You honestly can't tell if it's anger, or anxiety, or any other common emotion. But it exists. And you hate it.

It takes about another half an hour for them both to finish fixing the door. There's obviously still a dent within the door, but it looks at least more usable than it was an hour and a half ago. "Thanks Swansea." You say, him mumbling a half-assed 'yer welcome' before marching out of the room. His footsteps slowly fading away.

Daisuke stands there, a look on his face like he has something he wants to ask or say. "You can spit it out" you say, your voice coming out more harsh than you expected. His eyes widen slightly in shock before he sighs, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck, "Sorry about that. I've just been wondering," he stops for a second, looking at you leaning against the wall next to your bed, "Are you...doing okay?"

His face looks unusually filled with worry, a look that you decide doesn't suit him at all. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be okay?" You look at him, feigning confidence. It feels weird, being this concerned about someone being concerned about you, but you try your best to ignore it. "I dunno, you just seem, off. And like, I totally get it if your social battery is plummeting, sometimes I get like that too and it is definitely not awesome."

He continues on for a minute or two, but stops when he notices you just looking at him. You're not saying anything, just looking at him, caringly. His face reddens slightly "Sorry, just long story short, I just want to make sure my friend is okay." He says, and you feel a slight sting at the word 'friend'. You knew you were friends, but hearing him say it, like it's a concrete thing happening, it hurts, and it's terrible.

"Yeah...I appreciate it." You say, and Daisuke smiles softly. And things feel less confusing for a minute. You aren't worried that people have their own incorrect opinions on you. You were here right now, and you were looking at your friend.

Friend.

Day 70

You couldn't sleep the night after they fixed your door. Or the night after that. It's been 6 whole days you haven't been able to sleep, and tonight is no exception.

You sit up on your bed, your feet planted on the hard ground beneath you. The ship always feels chillier at night, but it's hard to tell if it's just because of the placebo effect or if it's actually cold.

So now, like every other night, you stand up and leave your room. It's easier to think and walk at the same time instead of staying stagnant. It makes you feel nervous.

You slide a thin jacket over your larger T-shirt, sighing softly at the comfort it's warmth brings you. You step out of the room, checking to see if anyone else is wandering around before making your way to the lounging area. Maybe being somewhere else might help with clearing your mind.

You walk carefully, wincing when a step sounds particularly louder, and before you know it, you're standing at the entrance of the lounge room. As you reach to open the door, you hear some rustling inside of it.

You silently debate just not going in there before you decide that maybe at least having some company might be nice. You open the door, and low and behold, Daisuke is standing behind the counter, 2 sugar packets sitting on the counter, and one open in his hands. "It isn't what it looks like, I swear!" He almost shouts, placing the open sugar packet on the counter and raising his hands defensively.

"Oh so you aren't stealing 3 packets of sugar right now?" You ask rhetorically, chuckling softly. His head drops in defeat, sighing, "yeah...I guess it is." His sad reaction almost makes you laugh even harder.

You walk closer to him, carefully closing the door to the lounge, "Don't worry, I won't tell" you say, leaning against a nearby counter. He says an excited thanks before lifting up the sugar packet, mentioning random topics between each taste of sugar.

It almost felt good listening to him enjoy himself, not like the other times where you feel like you're about to go into cardiac arrest or something. This feels real, and grounded. Before you realize it, you've gone brain dead again, just staring at him as he talks.

"Earth to (name)?" He says, grabbing you by the shoulder. "Y-yeah? Shit sorry I zoned out" it feels like you've been doing that a lot lately, but then again a lot has been on your mind, "what were you saying?". He looks at you, his eyes containing something different in them.

You had been paying a lot of attention to his eyes recently, you sometimes could convince yourself it was on accident, but now you rely on it to tell you what he's thinking. But now? You couldn't even tell. "I just wanted to know if you wanted some." He said, offering the bag to you, a kind smile on his face. "Oh...yeah thanks." You say, dipping your finger into the bag and licking the sweet dust off of it.

You could say what happened next wasn't real, or was just a dream, but you know better.

After you lick the sugar from your finger, you look up at him, muttering a small thank you. What annoys you is that he's just tall enough that you need to look up to really make eye contact with him. You wanted to say something, anything. Maybe thank him for being such a good friend, or ask him how long he'd been sneaking the sugar, but your brain seems to be unable to actually form a coherent thought.

But it's not like he isn't looking at you either, actually his face is much closer than you remember it being when you thanked him. Have you really been in your thoughts this much that you didn't even notice him leaning down.

Had you focused on this detail any longer you would've probably missed the feeling of his lips making contact with yours. It was insanely unexpected, and confusing and everything.

It ends just as fast as it started, and before he can even fully pull away from you you step back, dropping the sugar as a result. You don't even have the energy to look down at the mess you definitely just caused.

You touch your lips, almost as if you'd be able to feel the ghosting of his on them. "You...you kissed me!" You say, more in shock than anything.

More thoughts than you can process are running through your head that you can't even tell if he says anything. 'why did he do that?', 'how did I not realize he liked guys?', 'when did he start liking me?'

'why did it feel so good?'

"Shit I'm sorry I thought...I thought you wanted it too and it just seemed like the right moment and-" he continues profusely apologizing, and even if he doesn't, you notice the tears pricking at his eyes.

You can't even listen, or do anything. Your natural instincts kick in and you just leave.

You rush out of the lounge as fast and quietly as you can, almost throwing yourself back into your room before you close the door. That shouldn't have happened, you guys are just friends, you and him are nothing more, you shouldn't be.

You slide down against your door, frantically grabbing at your jacket to try and ground yourself. You didn't like him. You can't like him, not like that. It feels almost like you're not even the one saying that to yourself anymore, it sounds more like your father than anything.

As you look up at the ceiling, and close your eyes, your body shaking from anxiety and shock, only one thing truly crosses your mind.

You like him.

You like a boy.

I'm beginning to think I have a weird addiction to ominous endings with weird one sentence paragraphs, but it's probably fine.

Make sure you drink water and eat food!

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